With a grouchy face, my little friend said "I'm fed up! You're stirring me up!" and stomped his foot.
Another little friend literally shuddered with joy as her birthday party enveloped her in good feelings.
Being emotionally literate means being able to label emotions in self and in others. Without this, empathy is undeveloped as perspectives are difficult to relate to. Without emotional literacy, the path to friendships is much rockier. Emotional literacy, as with all other developmental areas, requires practice, modelling and the right response.
Acknowledging emotions
A great way to start is to acknowledge emotion in a child as they are experiencing it. In the examples above, acknowledging that "I can see that you're fed up. Your face is scrunched and you have stomped your foot!" or for the second child, "Wow...I can see that you are so excited!" would be a great starting place. Rather than moving straight to the solution for the angry child, dismissing the emotion, or reaching for the camera for the happy child, take that moment to verbalise the emotion - put a label on it.
In the first example, the child has a good emotional labelling set in place. He has been able to show his feelings physically, as well as label them verbally. Whilst we don't know yet what has set that emotion off, we are clear and he is clear on that frustrated and quite obvious 'fed up' feeling. Child number two is non verbal. Whether this is developmentally appropriate or a delayed development, emotional literacy can still be taught. By using facial expressions and physical gestures, we know the child is happy and excited. By modelling the verbal expression for that emotion, we are adding to that experience a label and identification.
Tips: Mimic the happy action and verbalise the perceived emotion at the same time when appropriate. Be wary of mocking an emotion. Mimicking a stomped foot could seem jestful and result in a lost learning opportunity, escalating from fed up to meltdown! Don't dismiss or deny an emotion. If a child says they're angry, hurt, upset, telling them "No you're not" or "You'll be right" as the first response teaches them that the emotion was invalid, mislabelled, or not recognised.
Emotional Literacy using Literacy
Using specifically chosen children's books that highlight emotions, is a wonderful way to teach emotional literacy. Your local library would be an ideal place to start and you can of course approach the librarian to help direct you. Specific baby books with faces showing a variety of feelings can start even the smallest learner in the identification process. Toddlers and Preschoolers can be encouraged to reflect on how Wombat must feel in Mem Fox's 'Wombat Divine' at each page change, or the hat seller in 'Caps for Sale' when the monkeys take his caps and then eventually return them.
Tips: Don't be afraid to read the same book over and over. Indeed, that is a fantastic way to move from adult labelling to child labelling. It could also prompt dramatic play where emotions are pivotal to the story. Prompt, as the adult, and provide a story line that you create and the child acts out. If you're engaged and your face is a mirror, the child will have a visual of that emotion accessible immediately. Know the book before you read. This will help you adjust your voice or physical posture to really emphasis the emotions within. Books are pre-learning/post-learning opportunities. They can provide a reflective point if required during the identification of an emotion eg. "Remember how excited Hairy Maclary was to play with his friends?". The Center for Social Emotional Foundation in Early Learning (CSEFEL) provides a social and emotional
Book Nook with a number of identified books and some attached learning opportunities that families or educators can use.
Using pictures and apps
Having access to pictures of people in different emotive states can be as easy as using a newspaper pamphlet or a tv commercial. Asking questions such as "how is that person feeling?" and "how do we know that?" as well as more learning questions such as "what do you think happened to make them feel that way?" sparks great emotional literacy recognition. For children who don't identify emotions well, apps such as
iTouchiLearn Feelings or ABA Flash Card Emotions (American) or
AutismXpress (Australian) provide opportunity to identify and see emotions.
Tips: Used alongside an adult or child modelling the emotions will help reinforce.
Songs and rhymes
Changing words to songs is allowed! Adapt any nursery rhyme to fit the occasion, or use the recognised "If you're happy and you know it" to entertain while you learn! Putting on classical music or world music with different tempos and varying degrees of volume can be used to provoke emotions. Labelling a fast, loud, upbeat tune as excited, and having the children react in the same way, provides stimulus alongside the literacy. Being slow and peaceful during a relaxing piece of music also gives you a strategy to calm children out of a heightened emotion, using the opportunity to also learn the words for calm and peaceful.
Li'l Melodies Kindermusik in Wagga provides programs that promote emotional literature through music.
Tips: Remember to label your own emotions "I'm really happy as my friend is coming for lunch!" "I'm a bit sad because my friend couldn't come". Asking "What could make me happy?" isn't self indulgent! It provides the child an opportunity to try out what you've been practicing! Maybe putting on some beautiful music will make you feel better! Don't forget to show it! :)
Resources and references
The Raising Children Network has age based sections regarding communication and emotions. This link provides strategies for
Talking through Angry Feelings for Preschoolers. Log on to
www.raisingchildrennetwork.net.au for more ideas.
The CSEFEL website has fantastic resources for families. The articles
Teaching Your Child to Identify and Express Emotions and
Teaching your Child about Feelings are worth reading. The
Book Nook is within the CSEFEL website and, as referred to in the blog, provides some great activities and ways to use books to enhance emotional literacy.
Li'l Melodies Kindermusik in Wagga provides programs that promote emotional literature through music. Articles supporting social and emotional development are included on their FaceBook page.
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